alice called after it; and the others all joined in chorus, `yes, please do!' but the mouse only shook its head impatiently, and walked a little quicker.
`that's very important,' the king said, turning to the jury.
the mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on, `"--found it advisable to go with edgar atheling to meet william and offer him the crown.
`how doth the little crocodile improve his shining tail, and pour the waters of the nile on every golden scale!
she felt that she was dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she was walking hand in hand with dinah, and saying to her very earnestly, `now, dinah, tell me the truth: did you ever eat a bat?' when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
`i'm glad they don't give birthday presents like that!'
`well, be off, then!' said the pigeon in a sulky tone, as it settled down again into its nest.
`you promised to tell me your history, you know,' said alice, `and why it is you hate--c and d,' she added in a whisper, half afraid that it would be offended again.
`i speak severely to my boy, i beat him when he sneezes; for he can thoroughly enjoy the pepper when he pleases!'
`i wish i hadn't mentioned dinah!' she said to herself in a melancholy tone.
he came in with a teacup in one hand and a piece of bread-and-butter in the other.
let me think: was i the same when i got up this morning?
do you think you could manage it?)
`you might just as well say that "i see what i eat" is the same thing as "i eat what i see"!'
`no,' said the caterpillar.
`how the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!' thought alice; `i might as well be at school at once.'
never heard of uglifying!' it exclaimed.
`i should like to have it explained,' said the mock turtle.
it means much the same thing,' said the duchess, digging her sharp little chin into alice's shoulder as she added, `and the moral of that is--"take care of the sense, and the sounds will take care of themselves."'
it was the white rabbit, trotting slowly back again, and looking anxiously about as it went, as if it had lost something; and she heard it muttering to itself `the duchess!
while she was trying to fix on one, the cook took the cauldron of soup off the fire, and at once set to work throwing everything within her reach at the duchess and the baby --the fire-irons came first; then followed a shower of saucepans, plates, and dishes.
`poor little thing!' said alice, in a coaxing tone, and she tried hard to whistle to it; but she was terribly frightened all the time at the thought that it might be hungry, in which case it would be very likely to eat her up in spite of all her coaxing.
`i've tried the roots of trees, and i've tried banks, and i've tried hedges,' the pigeon went on, without attending to her; `but those serpents!
the duchess took her choice, and was gone in a moment.
`what was that like?' said alice.
she drew her foot as far down the chimney as she could, and waited till she heard a little animal (she couldn't guess of what sort it was) scratching and scrambling about in the chimney close above her: then, saying to herself `this is bill,' she gave one sharp kick, and waited to see what would happen next.
her listeners were perfectly quiet till she got to the part about her repeating `you are old, father william,' to the caterpillar, and the words all coming different, and then the mock turtle drew a long breath, and said `that's very curious.'
after a while she remembered that she still held the pieces of mushroom in her hands, and she set to work very carefully, nibbling first at one and then at the other, and growing sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she had succeeded in bringing herself down to her usual height.
and she began thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age as herself, to see if she could have been changed for any of them.
i do wonder what can have happened to me!
at last the mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them, called out, `sit down, all of you, and listen to me!
there are no mice in the air, i'm afraid, but you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know.
the mock turtle sighed deeply, and began, in a voice sometimes choked with sobs, to sing this:--
`the trial cannot proceed,' said the king in a very grave voice, `until all the jurymen are back in their proper places-- all,' he repeated with great emphasis, looking hard at alice as he said do.
it looked goodnatured, she thought: still it had very long claws and a great many teeth, so she felt that it ought to be treated with respect.
"there is another shore, you know, upon the other side.
ugh, serpent!'
`i think i should understand that better,' alice said very politely, `if i had it written down: but i can't quite follow it as you say it.'
`we quarrelled last march--just before he went mad, you know--' (pointing with his tea spoon at the march hare,) `--it was at the great concert given by the queen of hearts, and i had to sing
`or would you like the mock turtle to sing you a song?'
`wow! wow! wow!'
`i must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth.
`i can't go no lower,' said the hatter: `i'm on the floor, as it is.'
`thank you,' said alice, `it's very interesting.
i shall only look up and say "who am i then?
while the duchess sang the second verse of the song, she kept tossing the baby violently up and down, and the poor little thing howled so, that alice could hardly hear the words:--
`and yet what a dear little puppy it was!' said alice, as she leant against a buttercup to rest herself, and fanned herself with one of the leaves: `i should have liked teaching it tricks very much, if--if i'd only been the right size to do it!
`what a pity it wouldn't stay!' sighed the lory, as soon as it was quite out of sight; and an old crab took the opportunity of saying to her daughter `ah, my dear!
the duchess took no notice of them even when they hit her; and the baby was howling so much already, that it was quite impossible to say whether the blows hurt it or not.
`why,' said the gryphon, `you first form into a line along the sea-shore--'
`come, it's pleased so far,' thought alice, and she went on.
but she waited patiently.
and yet i don't know,' he went on, spreading out the verses on his knee, and looking at them with one eye; `i seem to see some meaning in them, after all.
off--'
`two days wrong!' sighed the hatter.
`i can see you're trying to invent something!'
my notion was that you had been (before she had this fit) an obstacle that came between him, and ourselves, and it.
`very,' said alice: `--where's the duchess?'
all the time they were playing the queen never left off quarrelling with the other players, and shouting `off with his head!' or `off with her head!'
the hedgehog was engaged in a fight with another hedgehog, which seemed to alice an excellent opportunity for croqueting one of them with the other: the only difficulty was, that her flamingo was gone across to the other side of the garden, where alice could see it trying in a helpless sort of way to fly up into a tree.
`what for?' said the one who had spoken first.
down, down, down.
at this moment the door of the house opened, and a large plate came skimming out, straight at the footman's head: it just grazed his nose, and broke to pieces against one of the trees behind him.
the antipathies, i think--' (she was rather glad there was no one listening, this time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) `--but i shall have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know.
`that's the judge,' she said to herself, `because of his great wig.'
`sixteenth,' added the dormouse.
(the unfortunate little bill had left off writing on his slate with one finger, as he found it made no mark; but he now hastily began again, using the ink, that was trickling down his face, as long as it lasted.)
chorus.
(in which the cook and the baby joined):--
so they got their tails fast in their mouths.
`the queen of hearts, she made some tarts, all on a summer day: the knave of hearts, he stole those tarts, and took them quite away!'
`he might bite,' alice cautiously replied, not feeling at all anxious to have the experiment tried.
the pool of tears
on various pretexts they all moved off, and alice was soon left alone.
as she said these words her foot slipped, and in another moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt water.
just then her head struck against the roof of the hall: in fact she was now more than nine feet high, and she at once took up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door.
why, i wouldn't say anything about it, even if i fell off the top of the house!'
`i'm not a mile high,' said alice.
i shall be late!'
`two lines!' cried the mock turtle.
`then the eleventh day must have been a holiday?'
(for when she looked down at her feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so far off).
`reeling and writhing, of course, to begin with,' the mock turtle replied; `and then the different branches of arithmetic-- ambition, distraction, uglification, and derision.'
`then you should say what you mean,' the march hare went on.
`i dare say you're wondering why i don't put my arm round your waist,' the duchess said after a pause: `the reason is, that i'm doubtful about the temper of your flamingo.
`that's enough about lessons,' the gryphon interrupted in a very decided tone: `tell her something about the games now.'
it did so indeed, and much sooner than she had expected: before she had drunk half the bottle, she found her head pressing against the ceiling, and had to stoop to save her neck from being broken.
alice's evidence
and the moral of that is--"birds of a feather flock together."'
`i'd nearly forgotten to ask.'
`talking of axes,' said the duchess, `chop off her head!'
i vote the young lady tells us a story.'
an invitation from the queen to play croquet.'
`why, there they are!' said the king triumphantly, pointing to the tarts on the table.
she had already heard her sentence three of the players to be executed for having missed their turns, and she did not like the look of things at all, as the game was in such confusion that she never knew whether it was her turn or not.
i almost think i can remember feeling a little different.
`i couldn't afford to learn it.' said the mock turtle with a sigh.
`nearly two miles high,' added the queen.
but at any rate he might answer questions.--how am i to get in?' she repeated, aloud.
next came an angry voice--the rabbit's--`pat!
the judge, by the way, was the king; and as he wore his crown over the wig, (look at the frontispiece if you want to see how he did it,) he did not look at all comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.
alice watched the white rabbit as he fumbled over the list, feeling very curious to see what the next witness would be like, `--for they haven't got much evidence yet,' she said to herself.
`that would be grand, certainly,' said alice thoughtfully: `but then--i shouldn't be hungry for it, you know.'
`at any rate i'll never go there again!' said alice as she picked her way through the wood.
`the idea of having the sentence first!'
alice felt dreadfully puzzled.
`everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.'
as soon as the jury had a little recovered from the shock of being upset, and their slates and pencils had been found and handed back to them, they set to work very diligently to write out a history of the accident, all except the lizard, who seemed too much overcome to do anything but sit with its mouth open, gazing up into the roof of the court.
`sentence first--verdict afterwards.'
`collar that dormouse,' the queen shrieked out.
why, i haven't had a wink of sleep these three weeks!'
would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.
she took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was labelled `orange marmalade', but to her great disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she fell past it.
now i growl when i'm pleased, and wag my tail when i'm angry.
`i've seen hatters before,' she said to herself; `the march hare will be much the most interesting, and perhaps as this is may it won't be raving mad--at least not so mad as it was in march.'
now you know.'
the long grass rustled at her feet as the white rabbit hurried by--the frightened mouse splashed his way through the neighbouring pool--she could hear the rattle of the teacups as the march hare and his friends shared their never-ending meal, and the shrill voice of the queen ordering off her unfortunate guests to execution--once more the pig-baby was sneezing on the duchess's knee, while plates and dishes crashed around it--once more the shriek of the gryphon, the squeaking of the lizard's slate-pencil, and the choking of the suppressed guinea-pigs, filled the air, mixed up with the distant sobs of the miserable mock turtle.
a little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly brown hair!
and the eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile: some of the other birds tittered audibly.
the queen's croquet-ground
`i'm sure those are not the right words,' said poor alice, and her eyes filled with tears again as she went on, `i must be mabel after all, and i shall have to go and live in that poky little house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so many lessons to learn!
alice looked up, and there stood the queen in front of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a thunderstorm.
`they must go by the carrier,' she thought; `and how funny it'll seem, sending presents to one's own feet!
alice said very humbly; `i won't interrupt again.
`what!
he had been looking at alice for some time with great curiosity, and this was his first speech.
`read them,' said the king.
the caterpillar and alice looked at each other for some time in silence: at last the caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth, and addressed her in a languid, sleepy voice.
there was nothing so very remarkable in that; nor did alice think it so very much out of the way to hear the rabbit say to itself, `oh dear!
`the first thing i've got to do,' said alice to herself, as she wandered about in the wood, `is to grow to my right size again; and the second thing is to find my way into that lovely garden.
`but, it goes on "they all returned from him to you,"' said alice.
`no, indeed,' said alice.
`i'll tell it her,' said the mock turtle in a deep, hollow tone: `sit down, both of you, and don't speak a word till i've finished.'
she said it to the knave of hearts, who only bowed and smiled in reply.
alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very hot, she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking: `dear, dear!
`i've seen a good many little girls in my time, but never one with such a neck as that!
`have you guessed the riddle yet?' the hatter said, turning to alice again.
there was no `one, two, three, and away,' but they began running when they liked, and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know when the race was over.
`speak english!' said the eaglet.
these words were followed by a very long silence, broken only by an occasional exclamation of `hjckrrh!' from the gryphon, and the constant heavy sobbing of the mock turtle.
`i never went to him,' the mock turtle said with a sigh: `he taught laughing and grief, they used to say.'
then she went to work nibbling at the mushroom (she had kept a piece of it in her pocket) till she was about a foot high: then she walked down the little passage: and then--she found herself at last in the beautiful garden, among the bright flower-beds and the cool fountains.
the moment alice appeared, she was appealed to by all three to settle the question, and they repeated their arguments to her, though, as they all spoke at once, she found it very hard indeed to make out exactly what they said.
`--and just take his head off outside,' the queen added to one of the officers: but the hatter was out of sight before the officer could get to the door.
half-past one, time for dinner!'
`i shall be punished for it now, i suppose, by being drowned in my own tears!
edwin and morcar, the earls of mercia and northumbria--"'
`where shall i begin, please your majesty?' he asked.
stop this moment, i tell you!'
`come on!' cried the gryphon, and, taking alice by the hand, it hurried off, without waiting for the end of the song.
`found what?' said the duck.
`did you say "what a pity!"?' the rabbit asked.
alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.
(which was very likely true.)
`yes, that's it,' said the hatter with a sigh: `it's always tea-time, and we've no time to wash the things between whiles.'
here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was immediately suppressed by the officers of the court.
chapter v
`same as if he had a bone in his throat,' said the gryphon: and it set to work shaking him and punching him in the back.
chapter ii
then they all crowded round her once more, while the dodo solemnly presented the thimble, saying `we beg your acceptance of this elegant thimble'; and, when it had finished this short speech, they all cheered.
her first idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, `and in that case i can go back by railway,' she said to herself.
`well, i shan't go, at any rate,' said alice: `besides, that's not a regular rule: you invented it just now.'
once more she found herself in the long hall, and close to the little glass table.
`it is the same thing with you,' said the hatter, and here the conversation dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, while alice thought over all she could remember about ravens and writing-desks, which wasn't much.
go on!'
`shy, they seem to put everything upon bill!
but here, to alice's great surprise, the duchess's voice died away, even in the middle of her favourite word `moral,' and the arm that was linked into hers began to tremble.
don't be all day about it!' and he went on in these words:
`stolen!' the king exclaimed, turning to the jury, who instantly made a memorandum of the fact.
`call the next witness.'
how i wonder what you're at!"
`i've heard something like it,' said alice.
`how are you getting on?' said the cat, as soon as there was mouth enough for it to speak with.
`off with her head!' the queen shouted at the top of her voice.
the next thing was to eat the comfits: this caused some noise and confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not taste theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on the back.
a mad tea-party
i think that will be the best plan.'
`it's all her fancy, that: they never executes nobody, you know.
`call the first witness,' said the king; and the white rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet, and called out, `first witness!'
`there's no such thing!'
`i could tell you my adventures--beginning from this morning,' said alice a little timidly: `but it's no use going back to yesterday, because i was a different person then.'
this was such a new idea to alice, that she was quite silent for a minute or two, which gave the pigeon the opportunity of adding, `you're looking for eggs, i know that well enough; and what does it matter to me whether you're a little girl or a serpent?'
`may it please your majesty,' said two, in a very humble tone, going down on one knee as he spoke, `we were trying--'
will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the dance?
there was no label this time with the words `drink me,' but nevertheless she uncorked it and put it to her lips.
`he must have imitated somebody else's hand,' said the king.
`i can hardly breathe.'
it's always six o'clock now.'
in the very middle of the court was a table, with a large dish of tarts upon it: they looked so good, that it made alice quite hungry to look at them--`i wish they'd get the trial done,' she thought, `and hand round the refreshments!'
there was a long silence after this, and alice could only hear whispers now and then; such as, `sure, i don't like it, yer honour, at all, at all!'
`swim after them!' screamed the gryphon.
`pray don't trouble yourself to say it any longer than that,' said alice.
`it's a friend of mine--a cheshire cat,' said alice: `allow me to introduce it.'
where are you?'
`which would not be an advantage,' said alice, who felt very glad to get an opportunity of showing off a little of her knowledge.
`only a thimble,' said alice sadly.
`but you're so easily offended, you know!'
the miserable hatter dropped his teacup and bread-and-butter, and went down on one knee.
`what is the fun?' said alice.
`don't be impertinent,' said the king, `and don't look at me like that!'
turn that dormouse out of court!
`i know what "it" means well enough, when i find a thing,' said the duck: `it's generally a frog or a worm.
they very soon came upon a gryphon, lying fast asleep in the sun.
let me see--how is it to be managed?
alice didn't think that proved it at all; however, she went on `and how do you know that you're mad?'
this time there were two little shrieks, and more sounds of broken glass.
`would you like cats if you were me?'
`i'm glad i've seen that done,' thought alice.
`there's plenty of room!' said alice indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table.
there was exactly one a-piece all round.
`you may not have lived much under the sea--' (`i haven't,' said alice)-- `and perhaps you were never even introduced to a lobster--' (alice began to say `i once tasted--' but checked herself hastily, and said `no, never') `--so you can have no idea what a delightful thing a lobster quadrille is!'
you grant that?'
`you ought to be ashamed of yourself,' said alice, `a great girl like you,' (she might well say this), `to go on crying in this way!
`seals, turtles, salmon, and so on; then, when you've cleared all the jelly-fish out of the way--'
so bill's got to come down the chimney, has he?' said alice to herself.
this speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party.
`beautiful soup, so rich and green, waiting in a hot tureen!
i wonder if i shall ever see you any more!'
`i haven't opened it yet,' said the white rabbit, `but it seems to be a letter, written by the prisoner to--to somebody.'
`i don't know what you mean,' said alice.
very soon the rabbit noticed alice, as she went hunting about, and called out to her in an angry tone, `why, mary ann, what are you doing out here?
alice felt a little irritated at the caterpillar's making such very short remarks, and she drew herself up and said, very gravely, `i think, you ought to tell me who you are, first.'
`i don't like the look of it at all,' said the king: `however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
`nobody seems to like her, down here, and i'm sure she's the best cat in the world!
`i'm afraid i can't put it more clearly,' alice replied very politely, `for i can't understand it myself to begin with; and being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing.'
`but then,' thought alice, `shall i never get any older than i am now?
`how am i to get in?' asked alice again, in a louder tone.
`and that's the jury-box,' thought alice, `and those twelve creatures,' (she was obliged to say `creatures,' you see, because some of them were animals, and some were birds,) `i suppose they are the jurors.'
so she began: `o mouse, do you know the way out of this pool?
`i beg your pardon,' said alice very humbly: `you had got to the fifth bend, i think?'
`just think of what work it would make with the day and night!
`i beg your pardon!' said the mouse, frowning, but very politely: `did you speak?'
she carried the pepper-box in her hand, and alice guessed who it was, even before she got into the court, by the way the people near the door began sneezing all at once.
`nobody asked your opinion,' said alice.
`then, you know,' the mock turtle went on, `you throw the--'
`i'm a--i'm a--'
`but what happens when you come to the beginning again?'
it was all very well to say `drink me,' but the wise little alice was not going to do that in a hurry.
`you've no right to grow here,' said the dormouse.
alas! it was too late to wish that!
`i've a right to think,' said alice sharply, for she was beginning to feel a little worried.
`i'm a poor man, your majesty,' the hatter began, in a trembling voice, `--and i hadn't begun my tea--not above a week or so--and what with the bread-and-butter getting so thin--and the twinkling of the tea--'
beau--ootiful soo--oop!
(as that is rather a hard word, i will just explain to you how it was done.
i--'
as for pulling me out of the window, i only wish they could!
just at this moment alice felt a very curious sensation, which puzzled her a good deal until she made out what it was: she was beginning to grow larger again, and she thought at first she would get up and leave the court; but on second thoughts she decided to remain where she was as long as there was room for her.
the knave shook his head sadly.
she had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the house of the march hare: she thought it must be the right house, because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was thatched with fur.
alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it but tea.
`i--i'm a little girl,' said alice, rather doubtfully, as she remembered the number of changes she had gone through that day.
`fury said to a mouse, that he met in the house, "let us both go to law: i will prosecute you. --come, i'll take no denial; we must have a trial: for really this morning i've nothing to do."
[later editions continued as follows the panther took pie-crust, and gravy, and meat, while the owl had the dish as its share of the treat.
why, it fills the whole window!'
`oh, my poor little feet, i wonder who will put on your shoes and stockings for you now, dears?
alice noticed with some surprise that the pebbles were all turning into little cakes as they lay on the floor, and a bright idea came into her head.
`off with his head!' she said, without even looking round.
alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the shore.
alice did not dare to disobey, though she felt sure it would all come wrong, and she went on in a trembling voice:--
`we won't talk about her any more if you'd rather not.'
`now, i'll manage better this time,' she said to herself, and began by taking the little golden key, and unlocking the door that led into the garden.
`once,' said the mock turtle at last, with a deep sigh, `i was a real turtle.'
i am very tired of swimming about here, o mouse!'
`how surprised he'll be when he finds out who i am!
`but i'm not a serpent, i tell you!' said alice.
`oh, you foolish alice!' she answered herself.
the door led right into a large kitchen, which was full of smoke from one end to the other: the duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle, nursing a baby; the cook was leaning over the fire, stirring a large cauldron which seemed to be full of soup.
the end
`come, let's try the first figure!' said the mock turtle to the gryphon.
`no, no!' said the queen.
(the jury all brightened up again.)
`oh, hush!' the rabbit whispered in a frightened tone.
"twinkle, twinkle, little bat!
`they were obliged to have him with them,' the mock turtle said: `no wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise.'
`what for?' said alice.
`i don't know where dinn may be,' said the mock turtle, `but if you've seen them so often, of course you know what they're like.'
`is that the reason so many tea-things are put out here?' she asked.
what are you?' said the pigeon.
two began in a low voice, `why the fact is, you see, miss, this here ought to have been a red rose-tree, and we put a white one in by mistake; and if the queen was to find it out, we should all have our heads cut off, you know.
`not i!' said the lory hastily.
who ever saw one that size?
`yes, we went to school in the sea, though you mayn't believe it--'
`we must burn the house down!' said the rabbit's voice; and alice called out as loud as she could, `if you do.
an invitation for the duchess to play croquet.'
therefore i'm mad.'
there was a sound of many footsteps, and alice looked round, eager to see the queen.